Glass Half Full

Well, it is time again for another blog....

I recently returned from a long weekend getaway at Chestnut Bay Resort on Lake Weiss in North Alabama with my family. Although it was a quick trip, it was absolutely wonderful, nonetheless. It was the ideal blend of relaxing, outdoor activities, family time and just simply letting my hair down (or, really throwing it in a ponytail). This vacation allowed me to refocus and de-clutter my mind for a bit. Everyone should have a vacation, at some point. It is good for the soul.

They are the cutest nephews ever.

Fun poolside.

The whole gang.

Lovely.

In addition to mini-vacation, I have been praying for a change in attitude about certain situations in my life. There are many things that, for so long, I've looked at as negative things in my life. Well, I believe that I'm in this stage of life for a purpose and I should do nothing but rejoice in that. It is not always easy to have this mindset, but I have to take a permanent vacation from looking at the glass half empty. I have to do this for myself and, more importantly, for the God I serve and who gave me this life that I'm living. It is His, and He deserves nothing less than my best. I read this excerpt from Oswald Chamber's My Utmost for His Highest last night and I took a lot from its meaningful message....

 "If I will do my duty, not for duty’s sake but because I believe God is engineering my circumstances, then at the very point of my obedience all of the magnificent grace of God is mine through the glorious atonement by the Cross of Christ."

Copyright Laws for Facebook?

So most of my blogs are semi-serious, but this one is not, although it is very much a true story. This particular blog is about a recent Facebook realization...

The "About Me" section of your Facebook profile is meant to represent who you are and tell your Facebook stalkers a little about yourself. It gives a glimpse of who you are, beyond all of your photos, wall posts and regularly updated statuses. Facebook is not a huge deal in my life. I don't spend hours uploading new photos or changing my status to let my friends know the play-by-play of my day, but there are a few things I do have on my Facebook profile that do, I feel, describe myself... ie. my "About Me" section.

I was randomly jumping from Facebook profile to Facebook profile today and came across someone I knew. I glanced at a few pictures and then scrolled down to read their "Quotes" and "About Me" section, which are always my favorite part of someone's Facebook profile. As I began reading their "About Me" section I realized that what I was reading sounding entirely too familiar. This person, who will be left anonymous, stole my "About Me" section I once wrote about myself(keyword). I know this is a minor thing but, to be honest, I was quite appalled. Who steals someone's "About Me" section? How can what I have to say about MY life correctly identify this person's circumstances and dreams?

I didn't know whether to be flattered or flabbergasted. But, I regained composure after venting to my fellow co-workers about the unexpected situation. My "About Me" section is changed and no longer matches the anonymous individual, but I can't help but wonder, "Are there any Copyright laws for Facebook?"

A Confidence That Is Real

I feel like since this year has begun that my relationship with God has changed so much. I do not mean this in a negative way, but it is just so different. Experiences and circumstances have challenged, and forced, me to see His beauty in ways that are new and fresh to me.

I spent my whole life in church. When Sunday rolled around I was always marked "present" in my Sunday School class and I graced the same back row pew with my family by my side. The subject of God and religion have always been present in the household I grew up in. I am very thankful for that. But, there comes that time in an individual's life when God goes beyond VBS, the youth group and various church functions. It is when He becomes real.

I accepted Christ at an early age and have grown to admire Him since that point. I can look back and see the people who poured into my life and encouraged me in my walk with God. They invested in my life, and I am unsure if at the time I was really aware the impact they were having on me as much as I do today. They taught me the fundamentals and, most importantly, they lived the way they talked. That is a beautiful thing that is rare to see and experience.

During college I could sense a change in the way I viewed God and what He meant to me. I felt Him in a way that allowed me to know that He truly did satisfy all of my desires. Life was good, and so was He. Guys came into the picture during this time in my life (I guess you could say I was late bloomer in this category) and He showed me how He pursues me as well. He knows how to love me better than any other. He showed me that He knew how to love me in such a great way because He knew me. He was personal.

From the end of my collegiate career to this very moment, I have been in a major "funk". It takes a lot for me to admit that. I am an extremely private person and I like to have things, ie. my life, together. I do not understand this phase of my life. What is harder to deal with sometimes is noticing that not everyone appears to walk through this mysterious period of existence. I cannot be the only person, but sometimes I feel like it. I have searched for a lot of things during the past year or so of my life. Trying to figure out what I could possibly have been placed on this earth to do. There have been seasons where I felt as if I would wander forever searching for my purpose, while living in the fear that I would stumble upon it when it is too late for me to fully enjoy in it. You are probably thinking "wow she worries a lot" and you would be correct (but I am praying about it). Despite all of this worrying and confusion, He has been by my side. Whether I make Him happy or disappointed, He never fails. His love is exhausting to me because of its consistency and His unwavering ability to love me, even at my darkest times. But through this "funk" there comes a sort of confidence. A confidence that this is real. He is real in my life. I may make poor decisions and try to do things on my own strength, but when I am hopeless He is mindful of me. There is a casualness to my relationship with Him because of the years we have spent together, but there is such a reverence and awe within me that will never cease.

I did not write this blog to draw attention to myself or my walk with God. I fail so often. I make poor decisions. But He has turned those poor decisions into wisdom for the future. Those circumstances have brought me closer to Him and closer to the peace that He brings. I want that for you as well.

Southern Hospitality

I have a variety of dreams that often have me living in some other place... somewhere new and exciting. A place that is out of the 251 area code. Although that is very much the truth, I've been reminded recently that I am so happy I'm from the good ole state of Alabama and that I can call myself a southern girl. I love the warm weather, and I like it when people say "y'all" or that they are "fixin" to go somewhere. It never fails that when I'm talking with someone who has a strong southern accent, I pick it up very quickly and easily. My words become a little longer and are encompassed by a bit more twang that usual. I love when I drive in my neighborhood people still send me a "hello" wave as I'm passing by.

Growing up on Mobile Bay, my summers were comprised of salty air, fishing and family. It was wonderful. I can't wait to see where the future takes me and where I might end up one day, but I love that I'm from the South. There's just something about that southern hospitality....

On an even more random note, I love this song by J.D. McPherson. I'm a fan of the song's old school feel. This song made me smile and tap my feet to the music. Hopefully it will bring a smile to your day too!

Just Thoughts...

Well, apparently I am a slacker on blogging. It has been almost two months since my last post. I'm never really sure how to begin these blogs, so I'll jump right in to what has been happening in my life recently...

Work. It seems like that is all I do these days. I like what I do, honestly. I enjoy knowing that I, at the very least, have the opportunity to make a difference in a student's academic career. Even if I just make it a smooth transition for them, that is enough for me. But, there are times when I struggle with being an adult. I know that sounds so silly and juvenile, but I have realized lately that there is such a large part of  me that is a complete dreamer. There are so many places I want to go. So many things I want to do. For instance, I've always wanted to go England. If I could go anywhere in the world right now, that's where I would go. I want to experience the thrill of London, and I want to feel the peace that comes from the exquistite English countryside. But I can't just up and go to England. My responsibilities and my bank account will not permit me to do so. I want to paint, get back to photography. I want to start swimming again. I want to volunteer. I want time to do the things that I promised myself I would do this year. I just want time to be me. As I write this I feel so selfish because all of these sentences begin with "I", so how do I try and figure out who Katelyn Graham is, without getting caught up in the life of Katelyn Graham? I know that everyone goes through this battle of our dreams v.s reality. But what is the solution? What's a girl to do?

I'm just trying to figure everything out. I've tried to fight and cover up the fact that I don't have everything together. I like to appear focused and that I have everything planned out. But, I do not. I have no idea what my future holds. I have no clue what God wants for my life. I know what the desires of my heart are, so I am trying to bask in the fact that God will lead me where He wants and that He will give me the clarity, passion and peace along the way. I am trying to enjoy not knowing. If you're actually reading this and you happen to think about it, please pray for me about this. Thank you so much dear friends.

Wonderful.

I'm not exactly sure how to begin this blog. God has been showing me so many things lately that I'm unsure how to form the words to compose a sentence that will relay to you what I'm trying to say. But, I guess that the only place I know where to begin is God's grace. I feel like recently I have experienced His grace and mercy so much more than I ever have. Some of the circumstances He has used to show me these beautiful attributes of Himself have been stressful and confusing, but now that I have started to see and feel Him in such a raw and uninhibited way, I'm so thankful for those circumstances. I don't understand Him. He is too good and I don't deserve His love or the relationship with Him that He eagerly awaits to experience with me everyday. I fail Him so often. I forget about Him so often. I take Him for granted, but He still provides. I think I know what is best, but He continues to show me His plan and timing are so perfect.

I'm at this point where I just don't know what the next step is or where I'm supposed to be. This has been such a journey for me. I have never felt this way before, if I'm being completely honest. I'm trying to figure out where God wants me and where I can be used. It has been such a lonely process at times. But, He has placed so many people in my life that encourage me, pray for me and, most of all, just want to be there for me. Some of those people might not even realize the affect they have had on me. I've truly started to realize that we are made for relationships. We can't do this alone. Most of the time I try to do this life on my own. I want to feel strong enough by not needing people to rely on. But I couldn't be more wrong. I need communication with other people. I need someone to laugh with after an exhausting day. I'm beyond thankful for the people that have poured their time, energy and love on me.

I realize this blog was quite random, but is a taste of what God is doing in my life right now. He is showering me in His grace and using people in my life to show me His love for me. Wonderful.

Working Hard or Hardly Working?

Lately I have been doing a great deal of thinking for a proper definition of hard work. I know this appears to be a simple answer, but I can't help but wonder if this definition has changed over the course of a few generations. Let me explain.

When I started my job this summer, the university had this seminar (for lack of a better term) examining this generation of students that we would be working with for the upcoming year and how their attitudes toward life will affect their college decision making process. It took a look at the current generation and the two generations preceeding it. The students of this generation were described as taking longer to become self-reliant, having a sense of entitlement to anything they think they deserve and desiring quick success with little effort. This description has been on mind since that day in August, and possibly so because I am grouped into that generation.

The more I think about it, the more I see it. If we want to lose weight, we simply take a pill. We learn how to do the minimal just to get by, whether it is school, work, relationships, etc. Often times commitment to people or organizations are nonexsitent due to the fear that someone might actually expect something from them, ie. responsibility. So, is this true? Do teenagers and young adults not know the definition of hard work and/or are they practicing it? Even worse, do they care? I know, of course, that this is all based on the overall and not everyone lumped into this category has this mindset, but still I think it is something worth further observation.

As I ponder these things I refer back to my original question of hard work. Is hard work doing what you are told and then going home at the end of the day? Or, is it doing what you're told to the best of your ability? Or, is it doing what you're told to the best of your ability AND going above and beyond when necessary? Would a "hard worker" complain when having to do a task that is not his or her job? Or, would he or she lend a hand if that meant the job would be completed? As I type these questions I admittedly am unsure of my answers. Of course I know which answers I would like to pick, but do they definitively describe my work ethic? Are they the adjectives that reflect my work habits and attitudes? I do not know. In addition to all this pondering, is it true that this generation, I, expect the best even if when the time has not been served?

So many things to think about. My hope and desire for this generation, for myself, is that we would examine this topic of hard work in each of our lives. That we take responsibility, neglect laziness in exchange for determination and discipline and surrender our need  to "keep up with the Joneses".